The Anti-Wizard (GLOG)

 After that big treasure table post, I've elected to do a sprucing-up of Vulnavia's Anti-Wizard. I found that a lot of the things they referenced weren't reference-able due to seemingly being an IRL invention, and that some parts of the class were confusing at the table (given we were up at like 2 am with a goofy one-shot but shhh), so this post will include references for my version of the other stuff's equivalents as well. Without any further ado...

The Anti-Wizard

You aren't against the existence of wizards. You are one. You're an Anti-Wizard, a being that bends reality to your whim through use of spells. And with any luck, one day, you will be able to make it snap. You are not evil, nor good, only true neutral. You wish to return to the primeval nothingness.

They've succeeded before. Aspire to be as great as your off-world kin.
Original by Golubovy

Perks
Your spirit seeps outwards in an attempt to combine reality to itself so that one day it may truly be destroyed. Your dreams are real things happening in the ethereal plane/equivalent.

Drawback
You must absorb new sectors of reality into yourself such that it might be added to the list of things to purge each day. This can be as simple as reading about a new subject, hearing a new rumor around town, or even looking at something from a new perspective. If you fail to do so, however, you regain no magic dice for sleeping.

Cantrips

1. If you aren't using one of your senses, you can turn it off entirely until desired. Turning off touch is risky, lest you fall dead when you claim to be fine.
2. Cosmetic damage can be corrected, imbuing the ruined portion with primeval nothing which corrects its shape autonomously.
3. If you ask boldly and loudly, you can learn if you're being watched. Stronger preventative magics can defy this.

Spells

1. Mask of Dreams
2. Gemstone Edge
3. Master's Eye 
4. World of Thorns
5. Twist Rationale
6. Devour Sensation
7. Grasp Ethereal
8. De-scription
9. Anchor Soul
10. Dollhouse Windows
11. Combine to Absolute
12. Annihilation’s Pearl

Mishaps

1. Obliterated some old and forgotten unique memory. Magic dice only return on a 1-2.
2. An accidental deactivation of your senses boggles you. Unable to act for 1d6 rounds.
3. The ethereal plane overlaps your person. Save vs Mutation. On a success, mutation only lasts for 24 hours.
4. The ethereal plane overlaps your spells. Save vs Spell Mutation. On a success, mutation only occurs for this casting.
5. Your eyes perceive the ethereal. Everything is shuffled. Random target for spell, if not self.
6. An Authority (see below) arrives to investigate.

Dooms

1. The ethereal plane overlaps your existence for a day. Your appearance is subject to the perception of others. 1d6 Authorities will arrive in an equal number of minutes.
2. The ethereal plane overlaps your existence for a week. As above, but your physical traits (strength, dexterity, biological abilities) are subject to perception as well.
3. The ethereal plane eclipses your existence. You compress into an Annihilation Pearl, as per the spell.

You can survive your doom by anchoring your spiritual form into something that could rebound from being removed from existence.

Spell Descriptions

Mask of Dreams

R 0' / T self / D [sum] minutes

Your face fades away in favor of one you've dreamt up. This cannot change anything you could not imitate with a masquerade mask or good makeup. If you do not end this spell before the duration is up, your new face is permanent until you cast this again. You cannot dream up an identical face multiple times; memory and imitation is imperfect.

Gemstone Edge

R touch or sound / T an edge / D [sum] rounds

By touching upon an edge, you sharpen it to the likes of a razor. If you successfully touch on a metaphorical edge through use of words, this spell applies as well. Those who touch that same edge, willingly or unwillingly, take 1d6 damage. Damage dice size increases with additional [dice] invested, such that 2 deals 1d8, 3 deals 1d10, and so on. 

Master's Eye 

R touch / T [dice] creatures / D [sum] rounds

Amplify the sensitivity and refinement of a particular physical sense. The degree of amplification depends on the number of dice invested. 

1 [dice]: as discerning as a critic, as sensitive as a child. 2 [dice]: as discerning as a wine-taster, as sensitive as a newborn. 3 [dice]: as discerning as a sphinx, as sensitive as an orchid. 4 [dice]: as discerning as an angel, as sensitive as blank canvas.

World of Thorns

R 30' / T creature / D [sum] minutes

A creature you can see must save or be suddenly overcome by a creeping paranoia. Everything is sharp, bristling with pale marble thorns. They’re tucked under the petals of flowers, in the mouths of lovers, everywhere but their own clothes and skin. Every time they touch something, they must save again or take [dice] damage. This damage can’t kill them, and if they survive long enough for the enchantment to wear off, it’s all undone. At 4 [dice], the effect is passed on to listeners when they describe it.

Twist Rationale

R 50' / T up to [dice] creatures / D [dice] nights

Your voice shifts the perspective of up to [dice] creatures of [sum] total HD who hear it. Unless they save against magic, they accept the premises and values of your words (though not necessarily the words themselves). They have +2 morale while acting on their newfound ideals. Whenever their new ideals drive them to a course of action in direct opposition to their old ones, they get another save. 

Devour Sensation

R 20' radius centered on caster / T sensation you're feeling / D [sum] nights

Devour a specific sensation you're feeling and store it deep inside your heart. Everyone around you experiencing the same sensation immediately ceases to do so for [dice] hours. You relive the experience of this sensation every night (don't forget your perk). This recollection is like memory- a reconstruction that emerges in context, and might appear rather different depending on the circumstances you create for yourself.

Grasp Ethereal

R 0' / T self / D [dice] hours

You can only cast this spell during or directly after sleep. In [sum] seconds, sketch the shape of a monster, and have a player say the first [dice] words that come to mind when they look at it. Roll for its stats including [dice] HD and ask another player to grant it an ability appropriate to its new name, appearance, and stats. GM has final say on how things work. When you awaken, you’ll find it sitting by your place of rest. It is newborn, taken from its layer of reality into this one. How your party treats it, and what they tell it, will define its sense of reality. It holds onto this layer of reality until the end of the spell duration (even if slain), at which point it fades back into the layer from which it came.

De-scription

R 10' / T creature or object / D [sum] hours

Your hand phases into the target, flooding and warping the perception of such a thing. Neither the base target nor its metaphorical purpose/idea change, but rather the metaphor behind the target gets closer to a separate metaphor. The more [dice] you invest, the stronger this effect can be. 1 [dice] can change quality or style. 2 [dice] makes it a hybrid between the real and ideal version. 3 [dice] makes it an uncanny imitation– something else in disguise. 4 [dice] makes it unrecognizable, the connection so vague nobody could understand it. Unwilling creatures receive a save to resist having their purpose scrambled.

This is rather confusing, so I have made an example.

The target is a troll guarding a bridge. The idea at play is a toll bridge and the toll collector. Targeting the troll and investing one magic die might be able to give the troll the outfit of a bank robber, this being highway robbery. Two magic dice could have the troll learn the proper toll laws and codes for bridges in this area and apply them appropriately. Three may allow for the troll to gain some low level thief abilities, this troll literally being a robber who has elected to collect a toll. Four is where you can make the metaphor into something almost entirely different, the troll being an overworked underpaid minion for a local vampire some weird metaphor for capitalism. 

Of course all this doesn't change too much, but it can change the social situation drastically, allowing for new forms of parley, bartering, and the likes.

And then the Troll succeeds its save and murders you instantly cuz you're a wizard in close range.

Anchor Soul

R kiss / T ensouled creature / D [dice] nights

Places a pleasant haze over someone’s soul. This separates the target from the influence of other layers of reality, including afterlives or other planes. The target and other layers cannot observe or interact with one another, and any persistent influence on one by the other is suspended for the duration of the effect. Psychopomps won’t be able to tell when the target dies, and won’t be able to find them if they’re already dead. Dreams won’t find their way into their sleeping mind, etc. Unwilling creatures receive a save to resist. 

Dollhouse Windows

R kiss / T creature D [dice] nights

A single specific conviction, obsession, or delusion in your target becomes contagious for the duration. Anyone who they tell about it must save or be affected by it themselves. This is not an immediate effect. Rather, it roots its way into the victim’s subconscious and proliferates there, emerging from the context of their own life and experiences. When the duration expires, the contagion ends, but the delusions remain until the idea is disproven or countered. If the idea cannot be disproven, perhaps this person was bound to believe in it already...

Combine to Absolute

R sight / T everything real / D [dice] rounds

All layers of reality crash into each other like a wave upon a sandcastle. Select a word. Everything real within your line of sight (including yourself) must save or be that thing, in addition to what they are. If that thing directly contradicts what they are, it ceases to exist for the duration. 1d6 Authorities will come to investigate within the hour.

Annihilation’s Pearl

R 0 T self D special

A hair’s breadth from the tip of your nose, the world begins to end. Over the next ten seconds, the apocalypse blooms from that single point, dragging reality in on itself like a rain-soaked evening gown. This annihilates everything within a foot radius, gradually expanding by another 1d6 feet every minute, exploding on a 6, exploding in the reverse direction on a 1, and finding equilibrium on a 3. Once equilibrium has been found, the unmade zone becomes incredibly sensitive to imagination and perception, and a new reality flourishes from the dreams of those nearby. All other players draw what replaces the space left behind in [dice] minutes, which is then interpreted by the GM. The Authorities will be there within rounds.

The Authorities

This term is actually just a reference to whatever governs or investigates your setting's space-time continuum and its disruptions. Angels of a god? Federal bureau of anomaly investigation? That's up to you to have it fit. If nothing else, an ethereal being which doesn't like you messing up its turf. I highly recommend you put some thought into what the appropriate repercussions of this is in your game (note how the authorities aren't necessarily immediately hostile), but if you're just throwing more monsters in give them like 8HD and immunity to Anti-Wizard spells.

Closing Thoughts

This was really fun to do! That said, a lot of it was taken straight from the original Anti-Wizard post, with some personal tweaks. This class can get up to all sorts of wacky shenanigans if you're not too scared of its consequences. In the game I tested the OG class in, my character edited the language barrier such that all languages were dubbed over badly in common like a shoddy translation job, created an antlion-esc creature named occipital bone cribiform (thanks doc) who had the special ability CURSE OF THE NILE, and got reduced to dust by that same creature in the end when he tried to abandon it.

I hope you'll be removed from reality all the same. Have fun!

Customized Treasure Table Amalgam

Some grammar terms and generalities before we start.

Coins (or c) are general purpose coins that are worth 1xp. For gold standard worlds, this is a gold, for silver standard this is a silver, for copper a copper. It will be noted if rolled coins are of a lower value while more appear if needed. I prefer to have gold equal 1c and platinum be worth *10 what you roll of it, but people have different styles, so it goes.

Bulky Goods are for representing difficult to transport goods (you can't just stuff it in your pocket). It may be a painting, a gigantic dragon scale, furniture, et cetera. Usually improvise these based on the type of treasure hoard/location. These replace jewelry, because screw jewelry.

Player Level refers to the average level of the current party, rounded up. If you have a level 7 wizard, a level 5 fighter, a level 4 thief, and a level 2 cleric, player level would equal 5.

Area Level refers to the average level of the current dungeon or location, rounded up. You can calculate this fairly well with the average encounter's HD; If you have three hidden-optional-fight 5HD mummies but mostly 1HD goblins, area level would equal 1 in the goblin zone and 5 in the mummy zone.

Gemstones are rare minerals other than the normal metals that could be worth a good amount to collectors, appreciators of shiny things, et cetera.

This is heavily plagiarized and edited to my preferences with most (but not all) magic items being referenced from other blogs and tables and such. Big credit to Wizzzargh's Unified Hybridized Treasure Table Megapost for formatting and a decent portion of stuff.

Finally, this is a general list. Trying not to include much setting specific stuff so that it's easy to tweak to add to whatever universe you need; Artifacts are very setting dependent, though, and will probably not be as general.

Randomly Discovered Treasure
Treasure that just so happened to be in a room. If this treasure was guarded, roll with +10.

Roll 1d100.

•  1-20 - 10c/[Area Level]. Coins scattered about in a box, or on a corpse.
• 21-55 - 100c/[Area Level]. A pile, a small chest, or a minor chunk of a rare material.
• 56-63 - 1 Bulky Good/[Area Level]. A particularly big painting, or perhaps a heavy sealed chest with the value of all the rolled 'goods' inside.
• 64-70 - 250c/[Area Level]. Perhaps higher ranking coins, or a lost currency good for selling for historical purposes.
• 71-77 - 1d3 Gemstones/[Area Level]. Precious stones covered in dust.
• 78-85 - A lesser magic item- roll 1d50 on the magic item chart.
• 86-91 - Roll 2d80 again.
• 92-95 - 1000c/[Area Level]. Unobtainium, occultum, or the literal manifestation of economical power.
• 96-98 - 1d6 Gemstones/[Area Level]. Perhaps a collection.
• 99-100 - A magic item.
• 100+ - Roll 2d100.

Untyped Treasure Hoards
The main reward of a dungeon, that you didn't prepare.

Coinage

Roll 1d10.

1. 1 Bulky Good/[Area Level], as well as 1d4*500c.
2. 1 Gemstone/[Area level], as well as 3d6*100c.
3. 1d3 Bulky Goods, 1d3 Gemstones, as well as 5d6*100c.
4. 1d10*3 Bulky Goods.
5. 1d10*10 Gemstones. 
6. 5d6*500c.
7. 3d4*1000c.
8. 5d4*1000c.
9. Reroll 1d8+1 twice more.
10. Reroll 1d8+1 thrice more.

Magical Treasure

Roll 1d12.

1. Any 1
2. Player Level potions and scrolls
3. Player Level consumables
4. 1 Weapon, 1 Shield
5. 1 Armor, 1 Clothing
6. Any 1, 1 Miscellaneous
7. 2 Miscellaneous
8. 1 Accessory, 1 Wand
9. Any 2 or 3 potions, 2 scrolls, 1 consumable
10. 1 Staff or 1 Accessory; 1 scroll, 1 potion
11. Any 2, 1 Miscellaneous
12. Any 3

Gemstones
And how to determine their worth.

Roll 1d100.

•  1-17 - Ornamental, 10c
• 18-40 -Semiprecious, 50c
• 41-75 - Fancy, 100c
• 76-93 - Precious, 500c
• 94-99 - Gem, 1000c
• 00 - Jewel, 5000c

Additionally, gemstones have a chance to be slightly more special than rolled. When determining the value of gemstones, roll an additional d10. On a 1, the gemstone is somehow additionally valuable rather than just traditionally. Perhaps a local wizard really wants it for magic, or a historian recognizes it as a rare mineral imported from Generica and wishes to display it in a museum. Whatever the case, it goes up 1 category of worth. Jewels that are exceptional in this manner double in value and roll again.

Bulky Goods
And how to determine their worth.

Bulky Goods are worth 2d8*100 normally, but may be worth more with significance. Roll 1d4; if the result is a 1, roll on the chart below and roll 1d4 once again. Theoretically this can have you ending up with the Mona Lisa being worth 1,000,000c in a little village town, but that's pretty unlikely.

 Roll 1d8.

1. 2* worth.
2. +250c worth.
3. +500c worth.
4. +750c worth.
5. +1000c worth.
6. *2 worth.
7. Good is easier to carry but even more fragile- if player holding the item in their bag is hit, 50% chance the item is ruined. On duplicates, treat this as *3 worth.
8. Roll 1d6+1 twice more.
   

Jewelry has been banished from my games on account of being like a bulky good but way easier to carry.

Treasure Types
Honestly, I don't have any super different or revolutionary thoughts about these. Use your system's treasure hoard table or Wizzzargh's table on the page highlighted above. Otherwise, use the untyped hoards.

Magic Item Type

Roll to determine what type of magic item to roll for.

Roll 1d100.

• 1-30 - Potion
• 31-37 - Scroll or Spell
• 38-50 - Consumable
• 51-56 - Accessory
• 57-63 - Wand
• 64-68 - Staff or Rod
• 69-72 - Weapon
• 73-76 - Armor or Shield
• 77-99 - Miscellaneous
• 100 - Artifact

Potions

Bottled substances that cause wildly varying effects.
Potency is a measure of how many doses, how many dice worth of the effect it has, or its max HD of effectiveness. If a potion has potency, it will usually be determined by the NPC or Area Level.
Potions can be used in several different ways. Unless a potion specifies a way to use it, assume you can use it in the following methods:
Drinking - Duh. Basic potion stuff.
Bloodstream/Application - Applies to weapons, can apply to 10 arrows instead of one normal weapon. On hit, target takes the effect of the potion.
Splash - Thrown as an improvised missile weapon akin to holy water and oil. Those hit directly on are affected, those nearby get a save to resist.
Boiled Gas - Spend a Turn carefully heating it up to turn it into a gas cloud that lasts for [Potency] Rounds and is [Potency] * 5' square big. May heat up in 1 round with a strong heat source, but 1-in-6 chance the potion explodes and the gas immediately spreads out from the holder as a centerpoint. Each round someone spends in or moving through a gas cloud the effect activates on them.
Now, the actual potions.

Roll 1d50.

1. Healing - [Potency]*d8 healing - Ingredient: Skin of regenerating monsters.
2. Poison/Harming [Potency]*d8 damage - Ingredient: Poisonous monsters, or negative energy.
3. Love -Charm Effect. Lasts for [Potency] days, or if [Potency] > 9 permanent. - Ingredient: Nymph, Succubus, Incubus, or other charming creature's eyeballs.
4. Troll Blood - Heal for [Potency]*6, but save or gain [Potency] mutations as well. - Ingredient: Troll blood.
5. Fusion - If applied, can be used to graft body parts or reattach limbs. If fully consumed, next creature touched fuses with you to become a dual-minded-stat-averaged creature. - Ingredient: Ground up Chimera eggs.
6. Haste - Gives the effects of a haste spell. Lasts [Potency] Rounds. - Ingredient: A Roc feather or Hydra teeth.
   
7. Heroism - As BFRPG heroism potion. Gives effects based off of class/level. Lasts [Potency] Rounds. - Ingredient: Unicorn sap or other Good aligned creatures' blessings.
8. Mana - Restores a random expended spell slot. Can't restore slots above [Potency]/2 level. - Ingredient: A wizard's most used spell, ground up and distilled in a healing potion.
9. Growth - Enlarges the drinker, as Animal Growth. Needn't be a beast. Lasts [Potency] Turns. - Ingredient: Giant creature bone marrow.
10. Concentrated Cockatrice Saliva - Unpetrifies doused creatures. - Ingredient: Cockatrice Saliva.
11. Vitality - Grants [Potency] bonus HP for the day. - Ingredient: A part of a wight, taken from it while it lived.
12. Deadman's Wax - When applied to skin of a dead person, they can no longer be raised as undead. - Ingredient: Fat off the undead.
13. Ship in a Bottle - Contains a small boat with enough space for [Potency] occupants. When opened, boat plops out and enlarges to normal size. - Ingredient: A ship made by fairies.
14. Bottle of Gen - Appears to be an alcoholic beverage. When drank, allows for a reroll of one character-building roll (stats or HP) or the swapping of two stats. - Ingredient: Uncraftable due to exploit possibility.
15. Element in a Bottle - Contains one of the elements. Changes other damage types to the element encased within. Lasts for [Potency] Rounds. - Ingredient: A trapped elemental of the desired type.
16. Black Ichor - Heals [Potency]*2d4 HP. Roll a save vs spells; on a fail, become addicted and lose 3 from all main stats if Black Ichor hasn't been consumed in the last 3 days. - Ingredient: Obliterated soul remnants.
17. Gold Ichor - Heals to full. If you would die within this encounter, or died within [Potency] Rounds, instead revive with half health. - Ingredient: Fruit from an orchard tended by Gods.
18. Invisibility - As invisibility spell. Lasts for [Potency] hours. - Ingredient: Invisible Stalker eyes, or other invisible creatures' eyes.
19. Goblin - Codename for a terrible potion. Makes you puke, wasting a round but expelling and negating effects of poisons. - Ingredient: Goblin snot, or dead slugs.
20. Dire-Poison - Stronger poison effect. Save vs Poison or die. If ingested, no save. Doesn't affect creatures of [Potency]*2 or higher HD. - Ingredient: Poisonous creatures, but only stronger ones.
21. Rainbow - 3d50 random potion effects. - Ingredient: Three potions of different types.
22. Dragon Piss - Brand name for an extreme alcoholic drink. All rolls are a d2 (crit or crit fail). Lasts [Potency] Rounds. - Ingredient: A dragon's breath-sac.
23. Powdered Snow - Freezes a body of water. Cannot effect bodies larger than [Potency] * 10' squares, and will therefore only freeze the aforementioned squares. - Ingredient: Frost Giant beard.
24. Vile Blood - Heals Evil (undead, fiends, serial killers) creatures for [Potency]*3 HP. Good (celestials, good high priests, some fey) creatures receive a saving throw vs contracting mummy rot. Neutral (most npcs) creatures receive both effects. - Ingredient: Mummy blood.
25. Bone Milk - Increase AC by 1 for [Potency] Turns. - Ingredient: Skeleton Teeth.
26. Liquid Assets - Worth [Potency]*1000c. Can't be split into small denominations. - Ingredient: Bag of Holding cloth and the amount of gold wanted to be stored.
27. Polymorph - As the spell Polymorph Other, but it only lasts for [Potency] Turns. Ingredient: Doppelganger skin, as well as any other creature skin.
28. Identity Displacement - Like a permanent Magic Jar, you and another target you'd split the potion with swap bodies. Or do you swap souls...? - Ingredient: Displacer Beast heart.
29. Coffee - Allows for staying up for a night. - Ingredient: Coffee beans & such.
30. Stomach-Flies - Gives +2 to reaction rolls and +2 (high being bad) to enemy morale rolls. - Ingredient: Giant Fly eggs.
31. Fairy - Causes flight, -2 charisma, and reversed Growth effects for [Potency] Turns. - Ingredient: Fairy dust.
32. Royal Jelly - Gives +[Potency]/4 max HP, removes most basic curses, removes most basic and some magical sicknesses, and removes one insanity. If found in a dungeon, it is likely that the true owner is still seeking out its jelly. - Ingredient: Royal Jelly from a Queen's lair (Kingdoms Zine)
33. Clairaudience - As Clairvoyance, except you can't see and can hear. Lasts [Potency] Turns or until dismissed. - Ingredient: Giant Bat ears
34. Blabber - Forces target to speak [Potency]/2 truths about the question asked. Target can somewhat reroute this by using tricky or adjacent wording. - Ingredient: Hyena Tongue
35. Amnestic - Allows for reshaping a suggested memory, or forgetting it altogether. - Ingredient: Giant Leech Brain
36. Acid - Deals [Potency] * d4 damage. Deals *3 damage to inanimate objects/constructs. - Ingredient: Acidic Creatures (black dragon, oozes, slimes, etc)
37. Fury - The combined effects of a haste, growth, and heroism potion. However, must attack closest creature target in range each round, or if none are within range, automatically hit self. - Ingredient: T-Rex saliva
38. Ironskin - Increases unarmed AC by [Potency] for a Turn. - Ingredient: Gargoyle or Golem pieces.
39. Delusion - Appears as a potion of another random type. Main player believes they receive the effects, while others can see it's really just sugar-pill water. - Ingredient: Blood Rose sap.
40. Longevity - Reduces creature's age by [Potency] years. - Ingredient: Living creatures with long lifespans, or feywild fruits.
41. Spider Climb - Allows you to walk on walls and ceilings like a spider. Lasts [Potency] Turns. - Ingredient: Giant Spider legs.
42. Spell Mutagen - If drank, mutates [Potency] spells. If dropped on the page of a single spell, only it mutates. - Ingredient: Troll Blood and a Mana potion.
43. Hydrophobia - If drank, gives you hydrophobia. If applied, works as a potion of Water Walk for [Potency] Turns. - Ingredient: Chunk of frozen Water Elemental.
44. Frog - You may jump up to [Potency] times higher and farther for a Turn. - Ingredient: Giant Frog legs.
45. Mole - You may burrow into and through the ground with your movespeed. Lasts [Potency] Turns. - Ingredient: Tear of a Dwarf.
46. Schadenfreude - Reverses all incoming healing and damage for [Potency] Rounds. Instant kill effects and things that would otherwise normally kill you like crushing and suffocation still kill you. - Ingredient: Nilbog tongue.
47. Clairvoyance - As per the spell with the same name, and as the BFRPG potion. Lasts [Potency] Turns. - Ingredient: Blink Dog sweat.
48. Gusting - If inhaled, become lighter than air and slowly float up for [Potency] Rounds. If released without inhaling, creates a strong gust of air. Can push creatures [Potency] * 5' on a failed death ray save. - Ingredient: A bottled attack of an Air Elemental.
49. Rusting Fluid - Rusts whatever it touches. Gives -1 to metal equipment, or a permanent -1 HP if drank. - Ingredient: Rust Monster carapace.
50. Beyond-Our-Ken - Roll on a random d100 potion table. It's too late to save you from the 1d4 arms and legs and ear hair and height changing effects...

Scrolls or Spells
These sealed-papyrus containers of magic, occasionally encased in magic gemstones, oftentimes would have been useful in the fight with the monster that should have had them. Regardless, they were not used, and your players got some.

Anything Special?

 Roll 1d8.

1. Nope.
2. Nope.
3. Nope.
4. Cursed! Curse relates to highest level spell in scroll/book.
5. Notes! Contains research on 1d4: Local creatures, local geography, local renowned characters, new spells.
6. Tongues! In a random language other than common.
7. Map! Leads to another treasure-having location.
8. Esoteric! Spells are from a class other than wizard. Clerics, illusionists, druids, necromancers, paladins, spellcrafters, etc.

How Many Spells?

Roll 1d10.

1. One
2. One
3. Two
4. Two
5. Three
6. Four
7. Five
8. Six
9. Reroll 2d8.
10. Spellbook/Occult Writings; contains [Area Level] first level spells, [Area Level]/2 second level, [Area Level]/4 third, [Area Level]/5 fourth, [Area Level]/6 fifth, and [Area Level]/8 sixth. Skip the level determination portion.

What Level?

Roll 1d8 per spell.

1. First
2. First
3. Second
4. Second
5. Third
6. Fourth
7. Fifth
8. Sixth

Consumables
Single or few multi-use items that go away, never to return. Potions and scrolls will not be included here. If an item doesn't say how many times it can be used, assume it is single use.

Roll 1d50.

1. Caster Candle - If lit while a caster is preparing spells, they may prepare one more of their highest level.
2. Mystery Candy - When consumed, causes a random Wild Magic or Random Magic effect. You may use any random d100 table online or a custom one of your own as needed.
3. Binding Ink - When a contract is signed by two parties to make an agreement with this ink, they are bound by their word. Literally, they must make a save vs spells at -5 to go against the agreement. Unlike devil contracts, however, this ink goes with the spirit of the agreement, not the word.
4. Data Disk - Throw under a creature to try and capture them ghostbusters style. Said creature must save vs spells or be captured! From that point onwards, the creature is bound to the data disc and can be released or sent out at the wielder's will.
5. Rewind - A small button, allowing you to undo the last few seconds of what you did. Using a Rewind does not take a full action, and allows you to undo your round, if the results weren't what you hoped for. This cannot, however, rewind back past an enemy round, as the timeframe has already passed. It also cannot change the results of what would happen if you try the exact same thing again, ya doof.
   
6. Save & Load - Select a point as a ‘save’ point. Upon using this item again, you ‘load’, immediately undergoing the effects of a True Teleport spell with that location as the destination. If the location has since been buried or another creature is standing there, etc, you may telefrag. After ‘loading’, the item becomes a Rewind (see above).
7. Goodberries - A bunch made up of 2d4+2 berries, weighing an insignificant amount. They seem to be magically enchanted to saturate, with a single berry functioning as a day's rations.
8. Electrum Coins - 2d10+1 coins that shouldn't exist. Creatures with INT of +2 or above will seem to think these are of great importance and need to be obtained for duplication and distribution, while creatures with INT below that figure it's just a bunch of lame and fake toy coins.
9. Get Out of Jail Free Card - A small card with a hole in it. Place it on the wall and it will expand, allowing the user to pass through, and then disappear.
10. Orichalcum Mirror - Can be used to reflect any single effect that affects the wielder. Effect must have been anticipated however, and must be declared on simultaneous initiative or with a held action. Effects can be slightly vague with description, such as "The archmage's spell" or "The fighter's attack".
11. Rune Chalk - Allows for a caster to cast one of their spells without using the slot. Requires a Turn of preparation.
12. Twelfth Trumpet - Appears as if a trumpet, but instead of three fingerbuttons there are twelve. If played in order at a wall or other obstacle, both it and the trumpet will crumble.
13. Sally, Lost Teddybear - A small teddybear, well worn with somewhat of a childhood-memory nostalgia surrounding it. When rested with, the teddybear will disappear while not being observed. Coincidentally, no encounters will harass the party during the rest, regardless of where they are.
14. Horn of the Restless Dead - When blown, the horn crumbles to dust. The following round, 2d4 zombies and skeletons arise from the ground or meander from an unseen position. They will follow the commands of the horn-blower for a day before becoming wild. Animate dead can extend this duration if cast.
15. Primordial Rose - May be added during the casting of an element-based spell. Creatures immune to said damage type lose that immunity and gain resistance during the casting.
16. Sunburst - A small golden orb with a button on it. After the button is pressed, the orb will explode into a burst of light, causing all creatures within sight of the sunburst to become blinded for 1d6+1 rounds.
17. Echo Stone - Records the last ~5 minutes of conversation when rubbed. When rubbed again, the stone repeats the conversation before crumbling to pieces.
18. Handy-Dandy Multi-Tool - Can morph into any generic tool. Thieves tools, 10' pole, hook, hammer, shovel, etc. Appears as a multi-use knife until morphed, at which point it loses the ability to morph.
19. Medusa Head - The head of a medusa. May be used as a gaze-weapon, but only if the opposing creatures do not avert their gaze as well. Once at least one creature has failed their save, the ambient magic energy left in the medusa head is used up and it becomes stone.
20. Oracle of Nature - A small totem. May be used once to change the weather to whatever the user desires. Extreme weathers, such as meteors hitting the earth, acid rain to dissolve a city, or a nuclear winter cannot be recreated, and become the closest mundane weather.
21. Oracle of Apocalypse - As Oracle of Nature above, but summons a random disastrous weather. Roll 1d6: 1-Acid Rain 2-Firestorm 3-Meteor 4-Tsunami 5-Tornado 6-Sharknado
22. Feasting Spices - These small spices are good for 1d4+1 singular meals, or 1 grand feast. They greatly enhance the taste of the food, and allow for a re-save against ongoing effects such as disease or a curse.
23. Spellweave Pen - This magical pen can be used to directly change spells as you desire. It may change one letter in a spell name of your choosing to create a new, separate spell. You do not keep the previous spell. The DM decides what the spell does after it is chosen. Then, this item becomes a normal pen.
24. Panacea - A small pill. When consumed, instantly removes all diseases, curses, or similar negative ongoing effects.
25. Philosopher's Pebble - A knockoff Philosopher's Stone. Can be thrown at a caster with a missile attack roll. On a hit, a random prepared spell from the caster is consumed by the stone, and it becomes a Gemstone Spell Scroll with the inscribed spell. The stone then returns to your hand.
26. Dopplepaper - A blank sheet of paper. When placed on another sheet or paper or inscription, this item copies what was written or inscribed. Can be used twice, once on each side.
27. Pop Rocks - 2d4+2 candied looking stones. If thrown, makes a noise at target point that the thrower had in mind.
28. Boots of the Foolish Pursuer - A pair of walking boots. If clicked together and sat down, they will begin to walk in that direction, taking the path of least resistance. This gives people tracking the boots' user -32% (or -2-in-6) chance of successful tracking if they rely on footprints. Failed tracking attempts appear successful, but lead to the boots. At the end of their journey, the boots are destroyed from the elements they encountered on their path.
29. Eye-Dentifier - A small eye shaped techno-chip. When placed on an object, latches on. From the eye comes a small hologram/vision, in which the object's purpose is explained. Works as if it were an identify spell on magic items.
30. Snail Polish - Polishes snails. They gleam. Don't ask. Can gleam up to 1d6 snails.
31. Hex Eater - While holding this bedazzled scarab, the next curse you would receive is instead absorbed into the hex eater. It can absorb 1d3 curses before falling apart.
32. Black Lotus - Consume in the casting of a spell to cast a second spell in the same round.
33. Flute of the Lost - All nearby restless undead (mindless undead, or those who didn't want to be undead but were forced) must save (wands) or die. They cannot be raised as undead again. The glass flute shatters at the end of its song.
34. Sovereign Glue - A bottle of glue. Anything glued together and held as such for an hour becomes permanently stuck together, only removable by Universal Solvent (below).
35. Universal Solvent - A bottle of water. If applied, un-sticks two stuck things, even Sovereign Glue stuck things. If consumed, breaks metaphysical concepts, such as relationships or oaths.
36. Instant Noodles - A bag filled with instant noodles. If placed in cold water for a turn, or hot water for a minute, the instant noodles will inflate to become giant pool noodles, which connected act as a raft.
37. Skeleton Key - Molds to open any door with a lock. Remains in molded shape after being used.
38. Beenade - A grenade with a familiar yellow and black striped design. Summons an insect swarm of bees on impact.
39. Contingency - A minor trinket, locket, etc, that appears unassuming. When you would next die, you instead fall unconscious, but appear dead. A detect magic/speak with spells does not detect this effect.
40. Weapon Link - A small twig, shaped as a sword. Can be attuned to a weapon freely over downtime. When shattered (free action), the attuned weapon will appear in said snapper's hands. If no weapon is attuned, it makes a basic longsword.
41. Thread of Life - A connection to life itself. If severed in front of a creature, it must reroll its hit-dice. All damage already done transfers.
42. Shard of the First Sword - Can be consumed during a melee attack. Removes all resistances and immunities creatures have to melee weapons.
43. Shard of the First Bow - Can be consumed during a ranged attack. Removes all resistances and immunities creatures have to ranged weapons. 
44. Magical Bag of Winds - Can be used to propel yourself 50' in any direction by aiming backwards of where you want to go, or can be used to push creatures 50' in any direction forward from where you are facing. Unwilling creatures get a save (death ray) to resist.
45. Spearmintdeath, Frost Tyrant - A mere piece of gum. When consumed/chewed, your breath becomes icy, allowing you to cover water with tread-able ice and snow up to a range of a white dragon of your HD's breath weapon. This effect dissipates after use.
46. Crystallized Influence - When consumed, the next reaction roll made will be a max result/12. Cannot be used after the fact.
47. A Random Cypher - Donjon 
48. A Single Use Weapon from the weapons section.
49. A Single Use Shield from the armor section.
50. Permanent - As a consumable, but can be re-used many times. If not actually permanent, add 3d6 charges to make it noticeably different.

Accessories

Contains rings, earrings, piercings, tattoos, masks and other such non-cloth dressing options.

Roll 1d100.

• 1-4 - Ring of Protection - Adds various bonuses to saves and/or AC. Roll 1d100.

• 1-50 - +1 AC, doesn't stack with armor.

• 51-80 - +1 to saves.

• 81-88 - +1 to saves and AC. AC bonus doesn't stack with armor.

• 89-91 - +2 to AC, doesn't stack with armor.

• 92-94 - +2 to saves.

• 95-96 - +2 to saves and AC, doesn't stack with armor.

• 97-98 - +3 to saves.

• 99 - +3 to AC, doesn't stack with armor.

• 100 - Roll 2d100 again on this table. Add together.

• 5-6 - Ring of Earth Shattering - Negates fall damage.

• 7-8 - Ring of Sea Treading - Allows the wearer to walk on water.

• 9 - Ring of Invisibility - Casts invisibility up to once a week.

• 10 - Ring of Resistance - Grants resistance to an element. Roll 1d8 to determine which.

• 1 - Fire

• 2 - Fire

• 3 - Fire

• 4 - Cold

• 5 - Cold

• 6 - Electric/Lightning

• 7 - Acid

• 8 - Poison

• 11 - Spell Storing Ring - Roll for a scroll. The ring may hold that many spells of such determined levels. EX: Scroll rolled holds Wall of Fire, Invisibility, Magic Missile, and another copy of invisibility. Ring can hold one level 1 spell, two level 2 spells, and one level 4 spell. 

• 12 - Ring of Magic Hatred - No spells can be cast by, on, or affecting the wearer. No non-passive magic items function for the wearer. Passive magic items would be rings of resistance, protection, basic magic weapons, but not rings of invisibility, potions, or scrolls. Lesser versions may only have a % roll to deny magic.

• 13-14 - Regeneration Ring - The wearer regains 1hp/turn for each point of damage that was not fire or acid. 

• 15-17 - Collar Ring - The wearer may cast Charm Animal with the duration of Charm Person 1/day.

• 18-19 - Ring of Delusion - Appears as a ring of another type, but is actually only about as good as an easy to carry Bulky Good (see above) as it does not confer the assumed effects.

• 20-21 - Telekinetic Ring - Weight maximum varies. Objects held can be moved up to 20' a round. Roll 1d100.

• 1-50 - 25lb maximum.

• 51-75 - 50lb maximum.

• 76-85 - 100lb maximum.

• 86-90 - 150lb maximum.

• 91-95 - 200lb maximum.

• 96-98 - 300lb maximum.

• 99 - 400lb maximum.

• 100 - 500lb maximum.

• 22-23 - Concubine's Earring - Wearer is immune to possession and mental control effects.

• 24-27 - Animate Tattoo - A press-on tattoo that can animate to reach off of the wearers body. Allows for an effective extra 5ft of unarmed reach during battle.

• 28 - Pearl Necklace - A necklace with a slightly altered version of Protection from Evil, in that Undead specifically cannot directly touch the wearer (unless the wearer attacks).

• 29 - Circlet of Status - A small crown. With creatures who have a hierarchical society, you have 18/+3 charisma.

• 30-31 - Bracelet of Blinking - A purple gem adorned bracelet. You may expend a charge (max. 1 per round) to blink to a spot within 30' you can see. Does not take an action. The bracelet comes with 3d10 charges and can be recharged by any teleportation spell.

• 32-33 - Locket of Truth - One of three golden lockets in a collection. When worn, the wearer can only speak true* statements. *Statements made by someone who does not know the truth but believes something to be the truth, as well as half-truths (standing on the number 18 written on a piece of paper and being asked if you're over 18) are considered true statements.

• 34 - Locket of Truth (Cursed) - One of three golden lockets in a collection. As above, except the locket is cursed to be unable to be removed. A remove curse spell allows for taking off the locket.

• 35-36 - Locket of Truth Confirmation - One of three golden lockets in a collection. When the wearer makes a true statement, they can magically confirm to listeners that it is in fact true. Influential characters in opposition may roll under charisma to counteract this.

• 37-40 - Frog Bracers - Allows the wearer to jump up to 50' if given a minute to prepare.

• 41-43 - Animated Piercings - A large set of many small random piercings. If their keyword is spoken, they can be animated to attack foes as desired, for up to a minute at a time. They have stats as an insect swarm (3HD) without the aversion to fire, smoke, water, and sleep spells. If reduced to 0hp, the piercings de-animate and fall to the ground.

• 44-49 - Brooch of Freedom - Wearers of the brooch cannot be impeded by rough terrain, webs, vines, and the like. Any barrier short of an actual solid wall or fence will not stop the wearer.

• 50-52 - Medallion of Mind Listening - This token, when held, allows the wearer to listen in on the surface thoughts of a target as if it were an audiobook for up to 1 Turn. The target does not realize their mind is being read. If the target imagines something terribly loud, the wearer immediately stops listening and takes 1 damage. If used on a target, they cannot be listened to again for 24 hours.

• 53-54 - Medallion of Mind Intruding - This token, when held, allows the wearer to speak inside the head of the target as if they were an intrusive thought or telepathic being (50/50 when rolled). If screamed into, the target must save or be stunned for a round. After being screamed at, the target anticipates the screaming and becomes immune for 24 hours. Intelligent enemies who have been in battle against this effect before receive a +4 to their saves.

• 55 - Periapt of Great Wound Closure - This charm protects the wearer from great harm, assisting in closing wounds. As a result, they cannot die* by bleeding out and must be struck down with blunt force or complete decapitation. *The wearer can still be knocked out and still suffers all other negative mechanical effects associated with death based on system/GM.

• 56-57 - Hangman's Necklace - This cursed necklace imbues the effect of three random other Accessories. However, it slowly strangles the wearer, getting tighter and tighter. The wearer will die in a week after putting this necklace on, and they are aware of it and all of its effects. The necklace cannot be removed unless remove curse is cast by a cleric of 10th level or higher.

• 58-60 - Savage Tattoo - These glyph tattoos imbue the wearer with great power... at a cost. The wearer's physical stats become 18, while their mental stats become 3. This tattoo can be removed with great strength (18+) and application of heat, though requires a week to put on.

• 61-69 - Scarab of Warding - A scarab shaped pin that protects the wearer against various creature types as per a Protection From spell. Examples include protection from beasts, protection from undead, protection from humans, protection from lycanthropes, etc.

• 70-74 - Talisman of Eternal Youth - This talisman prevents the wearer from aging. It is ruined if fully submerged in water (accidental water such as rain is fine)

• 75-79 - Racial Ring - A ring that imbues the powers of the race which made it. Good for a peace offering. If there are no notable races in the area who would make such a ring, assume that it is human, dwarf, elf, or halfling.

• 80-82 - Vampire Anklet - An anklet which causes all damage dealt by the wearer to heal the wearer for half dealt. If the wearer strikes an undead however, they receive the damage and the undead heals itself in the same manner as stated above.

• 83-85 - Hell's Chains - A two-set collar and ball & chain. If both are successfully placed on a creature, they cannot disobey commands by the person who placed the items on them. As expected, wording can be twisted for diversion.

• 86-90 - Diver's Belt - A belt that allows the wearer to swim as their movement speed and breathe underwater for as many Turns as they have constitution points at a time.

• 91-94 - Ring of Weakness - A cursed ring which slowly drains the wearer's strength, dexterity, and constitution at a rate of 1/day. If it thinks it would be removed (remove curse, cutting off the finger), it will instead boost all physical stats to 20 and force the wearer to attack whatever would try to take the ring off.

• 95-96 - Mask of Darkness - A rough obsidian face covering. It allows the wearer to see normally through normal and magical darkness.

• 97-98 - Mask of Many Faces - A confusing skin colored mask that seems to break off into many screaming faces. At will, the wearer may assume an insanity to negate an otherwise lethal effect. This insanity manifests as an intrusive bonus personality.

• 99 - Ring of Ultimate Power - Grants ultimate power to Wizards, by doubling their spell slots (or Magic Dice). Truly, this isn't real ultimate power, but Wizards sure treat it like it would be.

• 100 - Ring of Three Wishes - Does what it says on the tin. Wishes are not limited in any fashion, but be sure to reserve your right to not make a level 20 character be with a level 5 crowd. If you feel particularly evil, make the effect unidentifiable and wait for players to make a wish without knowing.

Wands

For magical spell-like-effects that eventually run out. Assume you use a charge per casting unless specified otherwise. Also, unless stated otherwise assume a save vs wands as the main save type.

Roll 1d100.

• 1-10 - Sparking - This wand contains barely enough magical power to create a minor spark. It can be used as a melee 1st level Magic Missile wand with (25+1d20) charges.

• 11 - Glutton - This wand loves to consume spells put inside of it. It may consume spells out of a spellbook for a future 1-time casting (at minimum level possible) of said spells. Feed it 10 unique spells, and it will become a Glutton Rod (see staves and rods).

• 12-14 - Wellbeing - This wand channels its magic power to close wounds and heal the hurt. It may heal 1hp per round consuming a charge, or heal as many HP as possible consuming all charges. The wand has (1d20+14) charges.

• 15-16 - Third Eye - This wand automatically spends a charge and uncovers secrets within the room it is in. This includes (but is not necessarily limited to) secret doors, hidden traps, and invisible things. The wand has (1d10+5) charges.

• 17-20 - Spooking - This wand reads the deepest fears of those nearby, and uses them against them. When used, creatures within sight of the caster must save or flee in fear, as per cause fear. On creatures with no fears (such as mindless undead, constructs, or other such creatures), this wand has no effect. The wand has (1d6+4) charges.

• 21-23 - Blasting - This wand exists to destroy. When used, it casts one of three spells as if a 5th level Magic User. Roll 1d3 to determine which it casts. On a 1, it casts fireball. On a 2, it casts lightning bolt. On a 3, it casts ice storm. The wand has (2d6+1) charges.

• 24-26 - Guidance - This wand lights the way forward. When used, it casts Light on itself with the duration equivalent to what it would be if the wielder were the caster. The wand has (3d10+7) charges.

• 27-30 - Dangersense - This wand warns of upcoming battles. When used, it will make nearby enemies (within 30' or the next dungeon room) lightly glow. This glowing does not reveal the shape or type of creature/foe. The wand has (2d6+3) charges.

• 31 - Bootshaking - This wand causes people to shake in their boots. When used, it will cast Hold Person. The wand has (1d6+4) charges.

• 32-34 - Gusting - This wand uses great winds to push creatures. When used, a strong wind will begin to blow, pushing creatures in a 30ft line up to 10ft back. A save vs death ray is allowed to resist. This wand has (2d6+13) charges.

• 35-36 - ID - This wand is disturbingly good at keeping identities in order. For 1 charge, it may instantly identify a magic item (unless parts are magically hidden from identification). For 2 charges, it will speak the name the target would go by if approached. For 3 charges, it will speak the full name and common aliases used by the target. For 20 charges, the wand will speak the 'true name' (used for some magical effects and curses) of the target. Targets of greater HD than the wielder receive an optional save to resist. The wand has (2d6+8) charges.

• 37 - Cancellation - This wand was created by spellcasters, for spellcasters, against spellcasters. When used, it cancels a spell cast the round the wand was used as per dispel magic. Declare this when the spell is being cast; you can use your next action to use this wand. You cannot use your 'next' action if you have already done so last round. This explanation may be a bit confusing, so I'm going to link the rules it was inspired by (counterspelling). It takes a charge per level of the spell being cancelled. The wand has (2d4+5) charges.)

• 38-40 - Deathtouch - This wand is exceedingly good at killing things. You may spend any number of charges and make a melee attack with this wand. On a hit, you deal an amount of damage equal to the charges spent. Undead instead heal. This wand has (5d10) charges.

• 41-47 - Missile - This wand locks onto a target and ensures its demise. Spend any number of charges to cast Magic Missile as a Magic-User of the same level. This wand has (2d10+25) charges. 

• 48-49 - Whispers - This wand steals the voices of men to keep them humble. When used, spend any number of charges. The target must save or be unable to speak any louder than a hushed whisper for [charges spent] minutes. This does not disrupt normal spellcasting, as the verbal components may still be whispered. This wand has (2d8+14) charges.

• 50-52 - Action - This wand eats the time used casting it and spits it back out for later use. When used, you gain an additional action next round. You cannot cast a second spell with this action. This wand has (2d8) charges.

• 53-56 - Impostor - This wand hides its wearer. When used, spend any number of charges. You disguise yourself as a creature of your choice of similar stature, appearance, and feel. Your voice mimics the disguises', the texture of your skin feels the same as the disguises' (if different), and of course your body appears as the disguises'. This lasts for [charges spent] Turns. This wand has (2d10+5) charges.

• 57-60 - Confusion - This wand boggles the mind. When used, it casts Confusion. This wand has (1d10+2) charges.

• 61-62 - Chinks - This wand locates cracks in the opponents defenses. When used on an enemy with armor, it will highlight the weak parts of the enemies' armor. This subsequently reduces the enemies' AC by 2, or if using THAC0 increases by 2. An enemy may save to avoid this effect. This wand has (2d10+8) charges.

• 63-66 - Greenthumb - This wand befriends vegetation. When used, it casts Speak to Plants and Awaken. Roll reaction at +2, and treat the plant as a normal NPC from there on. It costs 1 charge to animate grass or leaves, 2 charges to animate a flower or small bush, 3 charges for a larger plant, and 5 for a tree or other giant plant. This wand has (3d6) charges.

• 67-70 - Blinking - This wand is, quite literally, all over the place. When used, it teleports the user up to 20ft in any direction. You cannot telefrag. This wand has (2d6+3) charges.

• 71-73 - Misting - This wand conceals and obscures. When used, expend any number of charges. A 25'x25' cloud of mist begins to form around the user. The mist does not move once formed. Attempting to fire into or through the mist gives a concealment penalty of -4 to the attacker. The effect lasts for [charges expended] rounds. This wand has (4d6+6) charges.

• 74-76 - Obfuscation - This wand encodes and encrypts. When used, target writing you can see becomes encoded however you wish. Other languages, actual common encryptions, or hieroglyphs/images describing the text are all good examples of an encoding. This effect lasts until the wand is tapped against the obfuscated text or the magic is dispelled. Magical writings retain their magic. Spellcaster spellbooks cannot be obfuscated; their own personal notes are already obfuscated enough from peasant language. This wand has (2d4+2) charges.

• 77-83 - Overcharge - This wand riskily forces more power into spells. When used, spend any number of charges, and cast a spell. The spell you cast may have either its distance increased by 25%, damage increased by 1 die (only +1 if AoE), or duration by one unit. Repeat for each charge expended. After determining the new spell's limits, roll a save vs wands at -[charges expended]. On a fail, roll on a wacky wild magic table and apply the effect. This wand has (2d8+4) charges.

• 84-88 - Spores - This wand sends shroomy spores to knock out opponents. On use, target creature is surrounded by spores. They must save or fall asleep. They can be awoken by loud noises, slapping/damage, or magical effects targeting them. This wand has (3d6+7) charges.

• 89-91 - Battle - This wand shoots at just the right angle to bypass enemy fortifications. When used, you may ignore concealment and cover for the rest of the fight. This wand has (2d4+1) charges.

• 92 - War - This wand is used by the highest war-mages for devastating results. When used, you may cast two spells. This wand has (1d4+2) charges.

• 93-97 - Wonder - This wand constitutes chaos. When used, roll 1d100 on the table below for what happens. Unless the effect states otherwise, no target means the target is the caster, or centered on the caster. Duration lasts for 1d4+1 rounds, minutes, hours, or days as per whatever the DM thinks is funny. This wand has (6d9+12) charges.

• 1-3 - Creatures within 20' must save or die by a volley of arrows from above. Surviving is entirely luck.

• 4-5 - Cast Teleport. If a location was not designated, or a target creature rather than a location, you cast teleport randomly/to the creature respectively.

• 6-9 - Cast Invisibility. Target isn't actually invisible, people just forget about them.

• 10-13 - An artful statue of the caster safely falls from the sky (see bulky goods).

• 14-15 - Target lets out a horrifying screech which stuns the creature nearest to it for a round.

• 16-18 - Nearest creature to targeted point has their skin changed to a random color.

• 19-21 - Shrink, as per reversed Animal Growth.

• 22-23 - Grow, as per Animal Growth.

• 24-27 - Wild magic field. Creatures within 100' of the point roll on (this table, or a wild magic table) every time a spell or magic effect is cast.

• 28-35 - Random spell. Roll for level, and then which spell of that level.

• 36-37 - Dead creatures rise as uncontrolled dead. They attack the nearest living.

• 38-40 - Casts Confusion.

• 41-43 - Nearby floor becomes icy. You can only move in 2-space intervals. Crashing into things causes a save vs death ray or fall over.

• 44-45 - All visible creatures begin acting as a play. Creatures killed become merely unconscious, spells are exquisite visual effects, blood is ketchup or red water.

• 46-48 - Go bald.

• 49-50 - Carried items, armor, clothing, etc jet off of the target into random directions.

• 51-53 - Casts Cloudkill/Stinking Cloud/other fart joke (whatever your system has).

• 54-57 - Lose bones for 1d4 hours. Target can only perambulate 5' as a blob of flesh.

• 58-60 - Burst into flames. Use burning rules as oil.

• 61-64 - 5d4 gems pelt the target for an equal amount of damage. 

• 65-68 - Gender/Sex/Body Type/Clothing Type inversion.

• 69-70 - Body swap with target, if no non-self target is selected, target is the creature nearest to you (including small insects or animals).

• 71-73 - Sudden birds heavily conceal the target.

• 74-75 - Head turns 180 degrees. Anatomical impossibilities are ignored.

• 76-78 - Polymorph Other on target, creature is random and can exceed HD.

• 79-81 - Phase into ethereal plane.

• 82-85 - Nearby trees become treants, and roll reaction.

• 86-88 - Clone target. Roll reaction.

• 89-91 - Regain all health lost.

• 92-95 - Reverse gravity.

• 96-100 - Roll twice more.

• 98-99 - Goofy - Roll on any one of those "d100 joke wands your party will love" websites. Wands of +1 Action that cost an action to cast, cone of cole that creates a cone of people named cole, etc.

• 100 - Demise - This wand kills. Casts death spell, disintegrate, or some other instant-death spell. This has has (1d4+1) charges. 

Staves and Rods
For magical spell-like-effects that are more unique, or can be recharged or replenished. Assume you use a charge per casting unless specified otherwise. 

 Roll 1d100.

• 1-3 - Glutton Rod - The evolved form of a Glutton Wand, the Glutton Rod becomes powerful enough to eat spells while they're being cast. If you succeed a save versus a spell, the Glutton Rod may consume the spell and allow a one-time casting of said spell. If the spell is an autohit/no-save spell like magic missile, you may roll to-hit with the Glutton Rod to consume it. Spells consumed in this manner are not removed from their previous containers, as they are merely copies. This rod maintains the original functionality of the Glutton Wand as well. Feed it 50 unique spells, and it will become a Glutton Staff (see below).
• 4 - Glutton Staff - The ultimate form of the magic devouring Glutton wand. It functions as a Glutton Rod, however in addition to its abilities the Staff is capable of stealing magic from magic items as well. Items with a specific + value subtract it from their save required. All magic and abilities thus stolen may be expelled as single-use magics. Below are given saving throws for magical equipment based on type:
• Potions and Scrolls - Save on a 17+
• Other Single Use Items - Save on an 16+
• Accessories - Save on a 13+
• Wands - Save on a 15+
• Staves & Rods - Save on an 11+
• Weapons - Save on a 7+
• Armor & Shields - Save on a 7+
• Miscellaneous - Save on an 11+
• Artifacts - Save on a 3+, possibly immune based on item

• 5-7 - Purification Rod - Created to remove impurity, this rod is a saint's best friend. For 1 charge, it may cast Light Cure Wounds. For 3 charges, it may cast Remove Blindness or Cure Disease. For 5 charges, it may cast Remove Curse. For 7 charges, it may cast Dispel Evil. For 15 charges, it may cast Heal, and for 30 charges it may cast Restoration. If a user of the rod cannot cast these spells normally, they may only use that function once. The rod begins with (2d10+10) charges, but may regain charges with a casting of Restoration.
• 8 - Staff of Resurrection - Revives the dead. Created by clerics to give lost souls extra chances. The staff has (1d10+3) charges. It can be recharged with any spell that would revive a creature. Various creature types cost different numbers of charges:
• Creatures in direct opposition of you cost 1 charge, overrides other costs
• Unintelligent creatures cost 1 charge
• Fighters & related classes cost 2 charges
• Clerics & Thieves & related classes cost 3 charges
• Magic-Users & related classes cost 4 charges
• Random people who are entirely powerless can be revived free 1/day
• 9 - Staff of the Twin Serpents - A +1 quarterstaff with two entangling serpents coiling about it. The staff has (1d6+4) charges, and may be recharged with Sticks to Snakes castings. The staff has various effects:
• "Free" Effects
• The serpents animate and slither off of the staff, acting as friendly pythons (BFRPG). If both are destroyed in this form, the staff ceases to function.
• The serpents return to the staff and de-animate.
• 1 Charge Effects
• A serpent bites at an enemy in melee. +5 to hit, 1d4 damage + save or die poison on a hit.
• A serpent spits at an enemy within 30'. +5 to hit, 1d4 damage + save or be blinded on a hit.
• 2 Charge Effects
• The serpents translate a single line's worth of old, forgotten-language text. 
• The serpents beguile an intelligent enemy into doubting its judgement. You may reroll reaction, but not more than once on a single creature.
• 3 Charge Effects
• A serpent bites at an enemy with a more virulent venom. +5 to hit, 1d4 damage + save at -4 or die poison on a hit.
• A serpent rattles its tail menacingly. Foes must roll morale; groups with differing morales all use the strongest morale score on the field.
• 10-13 - Staffblade - An inconspicuous cane. Roll for a magic weapon, and a guaranteed property. The staff acts as a concealed blade of that type.
• 14-30 - School Staves - These staves boost specific type of magics. Roll 1d8.
1. Evocation - Fireballs, Lightning Bolts, etc. +[level] to damage.
2. Conjuration - Summons. Summoned creatures have +[HD] health.
3. Divination - Spirit based spells. Speak with Dead doubles questions, Spiritual hammer deals double damage, Raise Dead time limit doubled, etc.
4. Enchantment - Charms, curses, blessings. Opposing saves vs. these spell types are at -2, or bonuses gained by Bless are doubled.
5. Abjuration - Shield, Protection From spells, removal spells. Protective spells have their effectiveness doubled, Remove Curse and Dispel Magic/Evil/similar have doubled level of effectiveness and halved chance of failure respectively.
6. Illusion - Illusions, ha. Opposing saves vs Illusion detection are made at -4.
7. Necromancy - The darker art of raising dead. Zombie animated dead retain their magical abilities after death, skeleton animated dead gain +[HD] health and can act on their own based off of general commands (maybe treat them well).
8. Transmutation - Polymorphs, Stone to Flesh, Growth/Shrink spells. Polymorphs and Stone to Flesh-es are saved at -2, Growth/Shrink spells are *1.5 in effectiveness (*2 damage becomes *3, etc).
• 31-34 - Rod of Love & Fear - This rod poses an old philosophical question. Expend any number of charges; for ten minutes, up to 10 creatures in sight per charge expended recognize you as a rightful ruler. Creatures of +2 or above intelligence or creatures with 8+ HD may save to negate this effect; though creatures with no semblance of hierarchy are entirely immune. Creatures are aware they have been charmed after the effect ends. This rod starts with (3d6+2) charges, and may be recharged with charm spells.
• 35-38 - Rodney, Staff Companion - An animate staff friend; it generates its own magic to keep itself going. Rodney will give useful tooltips and gives an ample GM excuse for puzzle-hints. In addition, Rodney may identify the names of spells/effects or magic items, but cannot disclose their effects.
• 39-41 - Immovable Rod - A 5' pole with a button on the end of it. When pressed, the rod will remain locked in place, no matter where it is, only able to be moved by forces above 10,000lbs or by pressing the button again to release it from its lock.
• 42-47 - Compartmental Staff - A normal staff that can be well used for carrying multiple other rods/staves at a time, or even more wands. Up to 4 wands, 2 rods, or 1 other staff may be slotted into the staff's sides, becoming visibly (but not magically) hidden. They may be used as normal, with the Compartmental Staff as a 'focus' for the magical effects. You may also mix & match wands and rods, allowing for a rod and 2 wands to be contained within the Compartmental Staff.
• 48-50 - Scepter of Stolen Divinity - Only Wizards/academic casters may use this staff. Roll for 3 random divine-caster spells; they may be cast through the wand costing a number of charges equal to their level. This staff starts with (2d6+3) charges, and can be recharged by divine casters casting one of the spells it uses into it.
• 51-55 - Scepter of Stolen Academy - Only Clerics/divine casters may use this staff. Roll for 3 random academic-caster spells; they may be cast through the wand costing a number of charges equal to their level. This staff starts with (2d6+3) charges, and can be recharged by academic casters casting one of the spells it uses into it.
• 56-59 - Centurion's Staff - A staff made of hundred year old repurposed wood once wielded by a corrupt centurion. Up to 100HD worth of creatures (sorting by closest, doesn't include obvious bypasses like mites or normal ants unless desired) 30' around the wielder must save or be charmed, as per Charm Monster with no creature limit. This staff starts with (1d4+1) charges, and may only be recharged by a casting of Charm Monster or Feeblemind.
• 60-64 - Giant Staff - An entirely too large staff. Must be wielded with 2 hands if not Large or larger sized, and instantly encumbers any such holder who has a strength less than 18. Spells cast while wielding this staff do not use spell slots, magic dice, or "use up" at all, but do use a charge of the staff. The staff begins with (3d6) charges and may not be recharged.
• 65-67 - Striking Staff - A staff designed primarily for combat, the Striking Staff acts as a Quarterstaff +X with a +Xd6 to damage, where X = the number of charges expended when attacking, up to a maximum of 3. Declare how many charges you will spend before rolling an attack. This staff begins with (3d4+10) charges, and may be recharged with a casting of Striking.
• 68-70 - Rod of Moderate to Severe Discomfort - This rod creates awkward and uncomfortable situations for amusement. It can produce a slew of cosmetic effects, however they are generally annoying when unasked for. Unwilling creatures may save to resist any of its effects. This rod starts with (1d6+19) charges, and may only be recharged by the sincere gratitude of a creature who did not realize they actually needed the effect given to them by this rod.
• 1 Charge Effects
• Gender Swap (NB becomes both genders, vice versa). Voice remains the same.
• Voice Swap. Deep becomes high pitched, gremlinish becomes posh, etc.
• 2 Charge Effects
• Height Alteration. Only a few inches, not enough to change size, but enough to make someone look small.
• Weight Alteration. Only a pound or two, not enough to harm encumbrance, but just enough to make someone look a little chubbier, or just a bit too thin.
• 3 Charge Effects
• Minor Cosmetic Mutation. Eyes blink sideways, two left feet, etc. DM chooses.
• Target becomes unclean; acne, greasy hair, dry dirty skin, etc.
• 71-74 - Staff of Equal Beginnings - This staff gives the opportunity to allow those otherwise ungifted at birth to become gifted. For a charge, you and a willing target may give or take 1 natural attribute, or exchange one for another. These attributes cannot be something learned such as a wizard's magic, but may be something like a dragon's wings, a halfling's wit, or a wight's level-draining touch. This staff has (2d6+3) charges and cannot be recharged.
• 75-80 - Actor's Staff - A staff created for illusions and trickery. For 1 charge, it may cast Phantasmal Image or Detect Illusion, Phantasmal Force for two charges, or Spectral Force for three. This staff begins with (2d6+4) charges and may be recharged with any of the above spells.
• 81-84 - Forest Treader Staff - A staff made for druids, nature buffs, and the rare woodland cleric. While in a forest, jungle, taiga, or other wooded terrain, you cannot be tracked without a magical way to locate you. In addition, you may cast Speak with Plants, Charm Plant, or Growth of Plants for a charge each. This staff begins with (5d4) charges and can be recharged by any of the above spells.
• 85-88 - Rod of Tentacles - A rod with the severed end of an unlucky octopus. For 1 charge, it may automatically succeed on grappling any troll sized or smaller creature, and for 2 charges, it may spew ink (as oil) at an enemy. They must save vs death ray or be blinded until the ink can be cleared. This rod begins with (1d20+4) charges, and may be recharged with ocean or sea themed spells.
• 89-92 - Stunrod - A rod intended to paralyze and prevent criminals from fleeing or causing more damage without killing. It may be swung for 1 charge to produce the effects of a Hold Monster spell on hit targets, or pointed towards targets for 1 charge to cast Hold Person. This wand has (2d6+3) charges and can be recharged with a casting of Hold Monster, or fully recharged with a casting of Lightning Bolt with a cumulative 10% chance of overcharging the rod and having it explode.
• 93-96 - Candy Cane - A caned staff made of sugar, spirit, and children's happiness. It may cast each of Remove Fear, Purify Food & Water, and Create Food (candy only) for 1 charge. This cane begins with (2d6+18) charges and may be recharged with children's happiness.
• 97-100 - Rod of Might - A rod capable of many mighty effects. It starts with (4d6) charges and can be recharged by winning in battles where Allied HD < Opposing HD. The number of charges added is equivalent to the difference between the above equation.
• "Free" Effects (Sword, Axe, and pole do not function when out of charges)
• Act as a Flaming Sword +1 (deals 1d8+1d6)
• Act as a Mace +2 (deals 1d8)
• Act as a Spear, Polearm, Lance, etc +3 (deals 1d6 one handed but 1d8 two handed)
• Act as an Axe +4 (deals 1d4) 
• Act as an (up to) 50' pole, while expanding pushes objects with +5 str or 500lbs worth of force
• Act as a compass
• 3 Charge Effects
• Paralyzation - Target saves or is paralyzed as per Hold Monster
• Drain - Target takes 2d4 damage, wielder regains that much health. Requires to-hit
• Fear - All that see the target within 30' must save or flee, alternatively dropping to 0 HP but staying (choice of the creature saving)
• 5 Charge Effect
• Fealty - KO'ed sentient creatures can be enchanted. They will serve the wielder as if charmed, receiving a save on a timer as per Charm Person or instantly being freed if the rod loses all charges.

Weapons
Stabby, shooty, piercy, smashy. Beat people up well, we all know what weapons are.

What Type of Weapon?

Roll 1d20.

1. Sword 
2. Axe 
3. Whip/Flail
4. Dagger
5. Bow
6. Crossbow
7. Sling
8. Scythe
9. Handgun
10. Polearm/Spear/Trident
11. Club
12. Halberd
13. Blowgun
14. Rapier
15. Rifle/2H guns
16. Net
17. Warpick
18. Mace
19. Warhammer
20. Other/Unique/Unusual/Yklwa/Bolas/etc

What Makes It Magic?

Roll 1d100.

• 1-45 - +1
• 46-70 - +0, 1 Ability
• 71-85 - +1, 1 Ability
• 86-90 - +2
• 91-94 - +1, 2 Abilities
• 95-97 - +2, 1 Ability
• 98 - +3
• 99 - +3, 1 Ability
• 100 - Reroll 2d100. Combine.

Sample Weapon Abilities

Select as appropriate, create your own, or roll some sort of dice to determine which is obtained.

1. Bloodthirsty - Can enter a rage in which weapon effectively gains +2, but may only attack nearest target (or self if no target is viable).
2. Slaying - Has a specific type of target. Against that target, it is +2 on top of whatever +'es the weapon would normally have. A +1 sword becomes +1/+3 vs dragons, a +2 sword becomes +2/+4 vs dragons, etc.
3. Dancing - The weapon may act on its own using a command word, taking an action to fight for itself against whatever comes near it.
4. Sentient - The weapon has a mind of its own, and a code to work by. Following that code will have it work with you and perhaps even point out ways to assist you, ignoring the code will leave it as merely a + weapon, and going directly against that code will cause the weapon to become a - weapon of the same power.
5. Trapped Soul - The weapon has the soul of another being in it. Whether purposely set into it and gone wrong, or trapped inside of it as punishment, the soul seeks any exit it can. When the wielder becomes unconscious or dies, they awaken/revive as the soul in the weapon, of their normal HD. If the wielder attempts to take control over the body once more, they must save vs magic or be trapped inside of the sword, continuing the cycle.
6. Elemental - The weapon has a minor enchantment to singe/shock/freeze opponents. +1d6 damage of a random element type.
7. Blight - The weapon is incredibly dangerous to the touch, due to poisons and blood-curses. Those hit by it and susceptible to poison must save or die.
8. Defensive - The weapon grants its bonus as AC in addition to to-hit and damage.
9. Enchanted - The weapon functions as another random magic item in addition to a weapon. Roll for which; potions/scrolls can usually be used 1/day.
10. Durable - The weapon cannot be destroyed by conventional means.
11. Vorpal - Decapitates on a nat 20.
12. Speedy - Always acts first, before all else in initiative.

I'll probably add more to this one over time, as its more of a list of examples than an actual table. I might also add specific weapon ideas if I have any to make a real table, but otherwise the weapons are kind of a build-a-bear situation.

Armor & Shields

Defend yourselves from the above weapons' blows.

What Type of Defense?

Roll 1d10.

1. Buckler
2. Shield
3. Tower Shield
4. Leather
5. Leather
6. Studded Leather
7. Chain
8. Chain
9. Chain
10. Plate

Possibly Unknown Armor/Shield Types

Bucklers are as Shields, but can only grant their AC on one frontal attack per turn, and cannot grant AC against missile attacks. Furthermore, they weigh nothing due to ease of carrying, and can be worn on an arm so as to leave the hand open for dual wielding or bow firing.

Tower Shields are as Shields, but grant 2 AC rather than 1 and additionally are so heavy a wielder loses 10' of movement in combat.

Studded Leather is as Leather, but has a base AC of 14 rather than 13.

What Makes It Magic?

Roll 1d100.

• 1-45 - +1
• 46-70 - +0, 1 Ability
• 71-85 - +1, 1 Ability
• 86-90 - +2
• 91-94 - +1, 2 Abilities
• 95-97 - +2, 1 Ability
• 98 - +3
• 99 - +3, 1 Ability
• 100 - Reroll 2d100. Combine. 

 

Sample Armor & Shield Abilities

Select as appropriate, create your own, or roll some sort of dice to determine which is obtained. As above, I'll probably make a full list later.

1. Violent - Armor gauntlets punches and shield bashes count as an offensive weapon of the same +.
2. Elemental - Resists a specific energy type. 
3. Spiked - Deals extra automatic damage during grapples. ~1d4 is good, 1d6 is better, and 1d8 is very good.
4. Enchanted - Functions as another magic item in addition to normal effects.
5. Durable - Cannot be destroyed by conventional means. If a shield and sundered to block an attack, remove this ability instead of breaking or losing a point of magical defense.
6. Floating (shield only) - Can be activated to become a 0-handed shield that floats around the wielder.
7. Magic Resistant - % chance to ignore magic.
8. Sentient - As above weapon ability of the same name.
9. Trapped Soul - As above.
10. Lightweight - Weighs half, and if armor then count it as one speed-stage faster.

Miscellaneous
A combination of the other categories' items that I have come up with after their section was done, things that do not fit into any of them, and essentially whatever I want.

Roll 1d56.

1.  Bag of Holding - Can hold reliably up to 4d6*10 pounds of equipment while only weighing 40 itself. No practical volume limit, but must be able to fit in a normal bag's mouth. Trying to locate a specific item within the bag takes a number of rounds equal to [Total Items in Bag]/[Number of Identical Items to the One You Seek], which isn't too bad except in combat. Can be turned inside out to dump everything out at once. If punctured or overloaded, the bag consumes itself and all items within it. If put in another dimensional pocket... Don't.
2. Bag of Devouring - As above, except an inorganic item within will disappear every day. Organic items such as living beings, food, or corpses of said living beings will instead disappear in 2d10 rounds. If a player reaches their hand in... it counts as an organic item. Do not tell them how long until it disappears, make it a game of limb-chicken.
3. Wings of Icarus - Wax wings from a fairy tale. Can be used to fly at your normal speed, but may melt at higher altitudes. On hilly, mountainous, or otherwise tall or very hot terrain, the wax wings have a 2 in 6 chance to melt and become useless if used.
4. Ordinary Pocket Watch - This entirely normal pocket watch makes tells the time. It may rewind save or be Slowed or fast forward grant haste each once every 3 days. All effects of the watch are normal. Do not question the watch.
5. Ynnian Chess Pieces - These chess pieces, taken from Ynn, enlarge when placed on either a black or white square of any kind. Roll to determine which piece you receive:
1. 1d4 Pawns - Halfling/Dwarf sized, movement and AC as chain, 3HD, 1d10 smash attack. Subservient to a probably concerning level, apologizes profusely upon even minor mistakes, good at teamwork. When any pawns are diagonally adjacent, they receive +2 AC.
2. Bishop - Human sized, movement as leather, AC as chain, 5HD, 1d10 smash attack. Highly religious, politically adept, good at drawing focus. Adjacent allies get +1 to hit.
3. Knight - Rider/Centaur sized, movement as unarmored, AC as chain, 5HD, 1d10 smash attack. Chivalrous and respectful to all opponents who return it, tactically minded, and great at exploiting weak points. Creatures flanked by a Knight take double damage from it; furthermore, it can bypass lightly breached walls, shield-walls, and other such imperfect barriers as if they didn't exist.
4. Rook - Ogre/Hill Giant sized, movement as plate, AC as plate + shield, 7HD, 1d10 smash attack. Stoic and solemn attitude, bulky and quiet, would take a bullet for friends. Allies adjacent to a Rook receive the Rook's AC if it is greater than their current AC. If an ally adjacent to a Rook is attacked instead of the Rook, the Rook may retaliate if within range.
5. Queen - Troll/Child Cloud Giant sized, movement as unarmored, AC as plate, 9HD, 1d10 smash attack. Beautiful and deadly, cunning and unstoppable, entire troops of fallen foes behind her. The Queen may attack all creatures adjacent to her every round. 
6. King - Troll/Child Cloud Giant sized, movement as chain, AC as chain + shield, 5HD, 1d10 smash attack. Serious and heroic, quick-thinking and certainly wise, the leader of the armies. The King may grant up to 15HD worth of creatures a second action, if he is unthreatened by foes.
6. Decanter of Endless Water - A decanter containing far more water than possible. It may produce a gallon per round of being poured out. 
7. Bag of Potatoes - A bag of potatoes which goes far deeper than dimensionally possible, resulting in infinite potatoes of any type. You may reach in to grab potatoes. Beware of anomalous potatoes...
8. Hat of Passerby - A beige cap. Those witnessing the wearer must save vs spells at -4 to recognize they are there, unless action is done to grab attention, in which case the effect is automatically dispelled. The hat may be worn as much as liked, but only functions for a turn per day.
9. Censer of the Wind - A focus containing the element of air. If normal incense bought wherever is used, an air elemental of 4HD will be summoned, rare or pricey incense will summon one of 6HD, and extraordinarily rare incense (likely needs a small adventure) will summon one of 8HD, all per the Conjure Elemental spell if it were reduced appropriately.
10. Brazier of the Flames - A focus containing the element of fire. If normal fuel bought wherever is used, a fire elemental of 4HD will be summoned, rare or pricey fuels will summon one of 6HD, and extraordinarily rare fuels (likely needs a small adventure) will summon one of 8HD, all per the Conjure Elemental spell if it were reduced appropriately..
11. Basin of the Flood - A focus containing the element of water. If normal water bought/found wherever is used, a water elemental of 4HD will be summoned, rare or pricey/ocean water will summon one of 6HD, and extraordinarily rare/deep cave water (likely needs a small adventure) will summon one of 8HD, all per the Conjure Elemental spell if it were reduced appropriately.
12. Urn of the Ground - A focus containing the element of earth. If normal dirt bought/found wherever is used, an earth elemental of 4HD will be summoned, rare or unique dirt/ground will summon one of 6HD, and extraordinarily interesting ground/dirt (likely needs a small adventure) will summon one of 8HD, all per the Conjure Elemental spell if it were reduced appropriately.
13. Attachable Appendage - An extra appendage of random type. Could be a wing, tail, arm, leg, etc. When attached, becomes a permanent bonus appendage of said type- recommended that the appendage relates to the area it is found in, and gives a weaker or equivalent ability as per what it is based on. Arms can hold more weapons, legs can give more speed, etc. Obvious downsides include being a terrible mutant, not being used to the new appendage, and not having other needed facilities to use parts of the appendage.
14. Coupon Book - A book of several different "cash in whenever" coupons/tickets/etc. Contains 2d4 coupons in order:
1. Free Cake - Summons a cake that all (unthreatened) even remotely hungry creatures will stop for.
2. 50% Off - Grants half cost to a business transaction of your choice.
3. Free Ride - Summons a steed for you to ride on until arrival at your intended destination. If destinations change midway, it will disappear upon arrival at the new destination.
4. Slay One Get One Free - Doubles the % likelihood of obtaining certain treasure categories from any given treasure hoard. Must be cashed in before the treasure is rolled, to avoid inconvenience.
5. IOU - Summons any friendly NPC once, on account of owing you one for something. If they could not get to your location on their own, they cannot get there at all.
6. Free Hug - Reminds you of the warmth of your parents' embrace/your pet dog's joy/the taste of a real good soup/etc, ending any non-permanent mental effects.
7. Prepaid Flowers - A good social gift. Can be cashed in to raise any reaction roll to 12.
8. 1,000,000th Visitor! - Roll for another magic item. When cashed in, you obtain it.
15. Helm of the Third Law - A helmet which posits that everything has an opposite. When worn, reverse the moral/emotional/personal/etc code of the wearer. If the magic is dispelled when the helm is still on, this effect becomes a jekyll/hyde type deal.
16. Tracker Token - A small trinket or item relatively fancy enough to be kept but not sold. Can be selected as a scrying target with the secret code- in which case the scry automatically succeeds.
17. Song's Sails - A small metal barrel. Upon musical contact, it will slowly expand into an entire galleon with thematic weaponry such as boombox soundwave cannons and strobe lights at a rate of 10' expansion per round. If the music stops, or the barrel is prevented from hearing it, the expansion will stop. It has various effects based on the genre of the loudest music played on board:
• Country = Begin to shrink, form back into a barrel slowly.
• Blues = Demotivates attackers. Reduce enemy morale by 2, attacks on the ship have -2 to hit.
• Background Music/Ambience = Sail at double speeds when not in an encounter/trap/etc.
• Electronic = Treat friendly magic effects as if the caster was 1 level higher.
• Folk = Motivates defenders. Raise friendly NPC morale by 2, attacks from the ship have +2 to hit.
• Hip Hop/Rap = Creates a encompassing field of sound; creatures attempting to board must save vs death ray or fall into whatever is closest below instead.
• Jazz = Random encounters cannot be "Instantly Attacks", becomes unfavorable instead.
• Rock/Metal = Condenses and concentrates aggression to create stronger attacks. Attacks from the ship and from the ship's inhabitants have +2 to damage.
• Other/Reference = Creates fun but ultimately only flavored effects. Classical may cause the scene to become black and white, traditional Mario music decreases the pixel quality of the map, et cetera et cetera.
18. Gauntlets of Ogre Strength - Grants the wielder 19 strength. All goblinoids are instantly hostile while wielding, as the strength was literally stolen from a great ogre. Only functions as the ogre yet lives or is remembered, lest their strength be lost to time.
19. Bracers of Arrow Catching - Allows the wielder to catch physical ranged attacks that they successfully dodged or saved from. It can be thrown back as an action.
20. Tome of the Deities - A very large codex of various prayers and blessings from various gods. Due to being made in a long forgotten age, the languages are nigh indecipherable, except to a cleric, who may bluff their way into getting over the incantations. All clerical spells may be cast from the tome, though the specific spell cast cannot be chosen nor specifically targeted. If left open on a page, the next spell-to-be may be deciphered and as a downtime option.
21. Lexicon Scholasticum - As above, but for Magic Users and their spells and such.
22. Crystal Ball - A famous tool of fortune telling and spying. May scry or cast Commune for one question (with the DM) once per day. However, there is a chance the magic within the ball mistakes one thing for another, and as such success rates are shown below.
• Friend/Family/Well Known - 70%
• Friend of a Friend, Saw in Person, Well Described - 40%
• Stranger, Heard of Only, Poorly Described or No Description - 10%
• If you have a piece of the target, or an item held close to them, the chance is raised by 25%.
• If the target is in another dimension, the chance is reduced by 25%.
• If the target has taken specific scrying precautions, the chance is reduced by 30%.
23. Obfuscating Veil - A cloak which generates illusions and blurs the wearer, hiding their true position. The first attack of any given battle is an automatic miss, given that it is not a large enough attack to hit all spaces around the wearer.
24. Gloves of the Technocracy - A set of magical metal hands, used as gauntlets. There are 3 main variations.
1. Attack - A red gauntlet, with streaks of yellow. Can be used to attack as +2 while unarmed, as well as burst open jammed and locked doors in a round.
2. Defend - A blue gauntlet, with streaks of orange. Can be used to defend as a +2 shield, as well as uphold falling walls, collapsing structures, or keep doors strongly shut from chasing foes.
3. Move - A green gauntlet, with streaks of purple. Can be used to grapple about, as well as initiate a rocket propelled jump up to your movement in height and strength score in length.
25. Phoenix Feather Cape - A cape made from the lost feathers of a phoenix. Should the wearer die while wearing it, they will revive (though still unconscious) at 0 hitpoints.
26. Phantom Lens - Allows the wearer to see into the spiritual world, being able to view ethereal creatures that linger about.
27. Bottled Building - Seemingly a charming knickknack, this bottle with a random building type within it encases the building within with size reducing magic, causing it to expand rapidly to full size upon the shattering of the bottle. If the building cannot expand appropriately, it will expand to as large a size it can, stopping when there is no longer space.
28. Friend-Charm Keychain - A chain with 1d4+1 charms. Upon removal of any given charm, a name may be designated. The creature thus named may then appear by the side of the caller, if they so wish. A called creature knows who is calling for them. Charms removed become useless afterwards.
29. Mountebanks' Cardsleeve - An attachable cuff to any sleeve. Upon being pulled, the wearer teleports as per a Dimension Door spell, and both the prior location and destination burst into smoke and falling playing cards. 
30. Boots of Speed - Boots that, when the heels are clicked, cause the wearer to move doubly fast as normal. After ceasing the effect, the wearer will need an equivalent amount of time to rest without moving at all before being able to run- both with the boots and in general- again. Can be used for 12 continuous hours before running out. Ha.
31. Boots of Elvenkind - Boots that cause the wearer to be capable of silent movement, when they wish it. Troll sized creatures and larger are too big to fit into these boots.
32. Jester's Boots - Boots that act as one of the pairs of the above boots as desired, but must be declared as being used. A third of the time, the boots instead make their wearer perform a short but loud and unmoving jig that prevents them from moving for the current and following 3 rounds.
33. Dust of Infectious Rust - A bag of dust which instantly rusts any metallic substance or object it comes into contact with. Similarly to a rust monster's abilities, even if the metal type would not naturally rust, it will rust regardless. Objects rusted with the dust and ground up afterwards become Dust of Infectious Rust.
34. Golem Guide - Teaches the reader how to create various golems. Usually costs many weeks and tens of thousands of coin. 
35. Accessorizing Multitool - A piece of jewelry or a minifigure of the character who owns it that allows to replace one accessory-slot with another. Use a ring in the necklace slot, a cape in the boots slot, etc.
36. Chime of Opening - When used, casts knock on every door within 30ft. 1/day.
37. Phylactery of Faith - When worn, allows the wearer to know if any given action or effect would change their standing with a god. Includes hostile effects.
38. Worm-rings - A set of two metallic rings half a foot in diameter. Whatever passes through one disappears and comes out the other.
39. Zodiac Lung - A lung that can magically replace one of your own. Allows for breathing underwater, as long as the water is unclean in some way. Gives a gunk-spewing attack for d4.
40. Eye of Horus - An eye that can magically replace one of your own. Allows for seeing what would happen if you were to walk forwards into a trap or situation, watching an alternative universe version of you where you are less fortunate die in the process. Longer travels are greatly hampered (half speed) by the avoidance of your own dead bodies.
41. The Deck of Many Things - Everyone knows it. If you don't, you're fooling yourself.
42. Book of Oblivion - A black leathery tome with nothing on its pages. Save versus magic to put something on the pages- a memory or a thought- forgetting it entirely. To retrieve anything from the book requires giving up either your most important memory or taking something additional you probably didn't want to retrieve.
43. The Black Candles - A set of everlasting candles that, if all are lit and sat down, seem to have their flames blow towards the greatest threat nearby. If you are the greatest threat in a dungeon or similar, it will blow towards you.
44. Spillproof Bottle - The most recent liquid placed within this bottle can be recalled to the bottle as an action. If it has been consumed, 25% chance to make the person it is recalled from sick. Liquids that no longer exist cannot be recalled.
45. Ropever - A 50' animate rope with the personality of a dog. Can be taught tricks!
46. Charlatan's Coin - When flipped, gives the result of whatever the flipper desires. Can be more than just heads and tails. Heads and tails coins can return "dragon" or "castle" as well.
47. Joker's Amulet - Anyone who laughs- or even exhales strongly after a joke- near this amulet must save or be overcome with laughter for a minute. Laughing out of character is the same as laughing in character. For online games, make sure you have a group you trust to be honest.
48. Grasswhistle - When blown, roll for a random encounter. If there's no encounter table for the area, the party may meet somebody interesting instead, such as a questgiver or merchant. Every time the whistle is blown, there's a 10% chance their hair will be replaced with grass. Hair can regrow after the grass is plucked or withers.
49. Lumberjacks' Lunch - A small wooden spike with a cold iron tip. Woodland creatures (including small fey) seem to die on it very often. Yields 1d10 rations each day. Fey despise the wielder.
50. Helm of the Naiads - A helm with Naiad hair. Treat water as unbreathable air while wearing. Don't fall off a boat while wearing.
51. Feather of Bravado - A feather with much flair. Wind always blows it towards the most appropriate rival (some versions prefer BBEG's) for the wearer.
52. Gossip Cookies - A set of 13 fortune cookies. Flip a coin. On a heads, it will grant a free rumor from the current or closest locale. On a tails, it will proclaim the death of the reader by the most appropriate monster on the most appropriate encounter table.
53. King Scamalot - A golden statue of a king from an unknown land. Appears to be worth 1d100 coin. When given or thrown away, the statue will return to its owner's pockets in 1d10 minutes. It will not return if it is given away by the new owner within the 1d10 minutes. Takes a slot by itself.
54. Cartoonish Remote - Various buttons allow for facial features popping off of the face. They still function as normal even if far away from their owners. Can be reattached with a few minutes of application. 
55. Mystic Saddle - A saddle that polymorphs any creature wearing it into a horse. Possibly owned by a bounty hunter who finds it hilarious to ride his bounties back into town.
56. Monocle of Entropy - If you stare at something long enough, it will fall over (or apart, depending on shape). 1 round for a candlestick, 1 minute for a sleeping cow, 1 hour for a small tree, 1 day for a cottage or large tree, 1 week for a castle. Must be within 100'. Blinking and rests are permitted for long duration staring.
57. More to Come... Maybe.

Artifacts

Crazy powerful, likely game-altering items that only have only one copy in existence. Otherwise, just another Miscellaneous, I suppose.

Roll 1dX, pick whatever makes most sense, or reroll because most of these are game warping. I won't judge you.

1.  The Heart Impaler - A shining gauntlet with a chain ending in a crystal spike wrapped around and connected to it. You may strap it to your arm, allowing you to wield it as a dual-wielding weapon while still holding something in your hand. It has a long/normal/short reach of 20/15/10. On a hit, the enemy is grappled by you and takes 2d4+3+(STR) damage. If slain by this, the heart is ripped out of the creature and it becomes impossible to revive by anything less than a wish or godly miracle. Can’t nonlethal while wielding, you rip hearts out.
2. The Book of Exalted Deeds - Classic. Uber-good book.
3. The Book of Vile Darkness - Classic. Uber-evil book.
4. Vecna's Bodyparts - I actually don't think I've ever used these. I'm sure there's a resource out there though, because with stuff like this and the two books above and whatever I'm about to put below, there has got to be an entire page of text on what they do.
5. The Philosopher's Stone - The wielder may transmute anything into anything. This includes making new living creatures, but copies of creatures that once were are just that; copies.
6. The Sphere of Annihilation - Small sphere. Annihilates anything that touches it willingly, body and soul. Unwilling creatures can save at -4. Can move it [INT] feet per round. Horrifying.
7. Statuette of Ba'al - A little gold idol. If fed 1,000c it will grow into a gold idol with a horse. If fed another 9,000c it will gain a badass sword. If fed another 990,000c it will become a giant statue that could be the centerpiece of a town. If fed another 9,000,000c it will awaken and attempt to conquer the world (and will probably succeed if you don't have deities in direct opposition). If defeated, it will return to being a tiny statuette.
8. Whatever Else - At this point in writing the post, I am exhausted for ideas. I'll come around later and edit, I'm sure, but I just want to get this posted and done and out of my mind. Your artifacts are probably setting dependent anyways, so these are just really strong miscellaneous items. I ignored a lot of really strong miscellaneous items, so you will have no trouble finding some yourself if you really need.